not so patiently

Our “final home visit” was last night. I was all excited about getting one step closer to being foster parents, only to find that only God knows when we will be certified. I’m not good at being patient. I know that God is in control but my heart sank when she said that she didn’t know when she could write our homestudy or when it would be approved. I know that hearing “your next in line” was supposed to be comforting but it wasn’t. I just can’t explain the desire that I have to be a mom, even if it’s to a child that will go back to a birth family. I know that separation will be difficult but I never expected this wait to be so painful at times. I know that there are children out there that need to know what love is and Shaun and I are filled with love we can’t wait to share it.

Please pray that God will fill the pit in my heart. Please pray that I will be patient and trust in the Lord. Please pray for the Children that God will place in our home and in our forever!

I am thankful for...

my woderful Husband who goes out of his way to make me happy, puts my comfort before his own, does all the laundry and makes the recycling pile magically disapper. He allows me to dream big and supports me though he can't see my vision... He loves me like Jesus!

being debt free, except our house, having an "emergency fund" and finding out the we owe on our taxes!

the desire to have a family and the courage to accept God's will.
the children that God is preparing for us.

our loving friends and family, people who make us happy and make us mad, make us laugh and make us cry... people that make us us.

my loving heavenly Father who desires my heart and has plans for my life.

can't wait to color!

I dream BIG! This scares Shaun and if I got real honest I guess I’d have to say it scares me too. Lately I have been in this real crafty mood and everything seems like a good idea! But my fear of not doing something well causes me to suppress my creativity until I go crazy and do something HUGE!

Most of the time when I burst, I burst with color! Usually I head to Wal-Mart when I should be in bed and come back with paint! I’m a bit afraid right now that this could turn out badly because I love retro greens my kitchen is in desperate need of color!

I am praying for a pretty weekend so that I can paint the dresser for the nursery this color, when I find new drawer pulls I want to paint them this color! Shaun is really afraid of what it is going to look like but he trusts me… for now at least. I’ll post a few pics when it’s all done. Hopefully attacking the dresser and toy box and maybe a few baskets with some bright colors will keep me from doing anything too crazy in the kitchen!

Between now and this weekend to curb my craft appetite I might cover some photo boxes with some pretty scrapbook paper to jazz them up. Nothing gets me going like a good reason to use a sharp blade and spray glue!

Envelopes and Answered Prayers

So I Friday I went and did some shopping… I bought all kinds of baby necessities like soap/shampoo, lotion, wipes, bottles, etc. I also got some fun wooden puzzles and other toys at some consignment shops. I had been saving my Christmas money and left over cash from other envelops for baby stuff. I had a blast gathering these items and was shocked to find that after all the purchases there was still enough cash left in the envelope to purchase a car seat!

Over the weekend I hibernated because of snow and illness and it was Tuesday morning before I realized that the envelope was missing. I was 100% certain that with all of the excitement on Friday when I got home to put the things that I had purchased in the baby room that I had put it in some strange place. When I got home I tore the house apart looking for it and could not find it anywhere. I finally determined that it must have fallen out of my purse in the parking lot at Western Heights on Monday when I was putting my keys away. Yesterday when I got home I was rummaging around looking for it, trying to tell myself that it was ok if someone else needed to be blessed by it when I found the receipt from Target. For some crazy reason I decided to put my pride aside and just ask if by chance an envelops containing over $100 was turned into lost and found.

I was shocked to hear that it was turned in, in asking I just stated that it was a First TN envelope and the lady on the other end of the line confirmed that it had cash in it. She put me on hold for 10 minutes while the manager searched for it, only to come back to say they couldn’t find and recommended that I call this a.m. to see if Jerry knew where it was. I spoke to Jerry and he knew nothing about it and looked everywhere he knew to look only to call me back as I was walking into the Dr. office to say he couldn’t find it!

Needless to say I was a bit flustered and it was noticeable! I was filling the doc in on the details of our journey to becoming foster parents and she asked what else was going on… she could tell something just wasn’t right so I shared with her the story of my envelope and how I was just trying to lay the frustration in the Hands of God because I knew regardless He was going to provide.

We started talking car seats and safety features and then she reported that she had a transitional car seat that was only used a few times that she would like me to have. Tonight she is going to drop it off at our house!

I love when it’s evident that God has answered my prayer and I love it even more when it the very last way I would expect!

p.s. if any of you are looking for a good obgyn, I highly recommend Dr. Johnson at Women’s Care Group, she’s wonderful!

1 down, 2 to go!

Sorry it's been so long since my last update!

As you may know we had our first home visit last Tuesday, things went well. It was not at all what I expected in that not a lot was asked of us at that time and it was more like catching up with a friend. We had every form that we could have possibly completed singed and were able to hand all of that over, the one thing that she stated she needed before scheduling our next visit was the one thing that we hadn't completed... the dreaded autobiographies!

Since then I have completed my autobiography (yesterday) but Shaun is still working on his. We set a personal goal of completing them and hand delivering them to DCS this week! Pray that with the completion of these our next two visits will be scheduled in a timely manner. Also pray for the DCS worker writing our home study, due to a co-worker in her department being on medical leave she now has a case load of appox. 50 foster and potential foster families that she is to write home studies on and support.

Good news is we have the "spare room" ready for occupancy. The crib and changing table are in place and the extra stuff is mostly gone. I still have a replica queen Anne chair in need of a good adoptive home and a set of unfinished barrister bookcases that need a foster home! We haven't really unpacked and laundered the bedding yet because I still get worried at times that they will say they don't want us to be foster parents or that we can't house infants! I also don't want it to baby ready for too long before we are even open to foster because that would be torture!

I still have things that I want to do by way of decorating and organizing and at times I find myself in there sitting and thinking about it(another reason the chair must go)but I know that for now we are in a good place!

Thanks to all of you for your words of encouragement and prayers! We can't tell you enough how much we appreciate your love and support on this journey!

p.s. I know you want to see pictures but I can't bring myself to post pictures of the work in progress. I guess if you want to see it you will just have to stop by unexpectedly!

It's been a while

Shew! So it's been a while since my last update.

We were finally able to get our 1st of 3 home visits scheduled, it will be on January 26. We have got lots of copies to make and another form or two to complete but I feel like we are pretty well prepared. I hope to get the crib and changing table in the room by then and start "putting the room together".

Pray for us as we work on these things, I have hoped to spend lots of time on this stuff recently but have had other stuff getting in the way. We will spend Saturday devoted to preparing for the home study. I have to proof my autobiography and Shaun still hasn't gotten started on his!

20-10...2000-10...stardate...The Year of Our Lord

I can't believe that it's 2010!

I just hate how quickly time flies when we are off work! We have accomplished a few things that I had hoped for but not all. We organized the laundry room and I found that the table that I love fits by the dryer so it is not for sale! We sat the portable dishwasher out in the driveway on Wednesday while we went to the zoo; Shaun was certain that no one would take it because I was honest on the FREE sign and wrote that it needed a new door gasket but when we returned it was gone... Happy Anniversary to us! The dinning table is now in the kitchen but I still have no pantry and desperately need one. I have also decided for certain that the kitchen must be painted.

For the most part the spare room is empty, I just have to find a home for this Replica Queen Anne chair that actually belongs to my mother but neither one of us have space for... it's burgundy pleather and free for the taking. Other than the chair and a few misc. items that need a permanent home the room is ready for some paint touch ups and baby furniture. I can't wait to start getting it together, we have been looking at bedding and found something that we agree on so I need to purchase it before one of us changes our mind!

Of course I still have to finish my autobiography and Shaun has to start his but since we still haven't heard from DCS I'd say we are in pretty good shape.